This is me after my night tonight. Yeah look at me. I'm pissed. This week has been a series of bizarre happenstances. Not good ones either. Finding a fifty? That's a good one. The ones I get blow. What gives.
Okay let's start with Monday. I'm leaving my girlfriend's house. It's snowing. I then realize I left my laptop at her house. Along with all my shit from work. So I give her a call, throw my cell phone on the passenger seat and turn around. Yeah that was the last time I ever saw it. I got up the next day and couldn't find it. I tore apart my car, looked in my pockets and in my house. No. It's gone. I didn't just lose it. It completely disappeared of the face of the earth. End result...I have to drop some dough and get a new one. Oh and yeah it's a camera phone too. So before you know it I'll get bored and post pictures of my ass. So use precaution when reading these in the future.
So then on Thursday, I go to the doctor's. Yeah...I have mononucleosis. That's right. MONO. How did I get mono, you ask? Yeah...I have no fucking clue. The lady told me that some eight year old caught it by using restaurant glasses that weren't washed properly. That's fantastic. Remind me not to eat in any restaurants that don't serve disposable cups.
So yeah tonight. My KEYS disappear! What the fuck?!? I was using em on register and when I go to leave...no. What gives people. I haven't lost anything that significant my entire life, and then I do it twice in a week. And this isn't just losing these things. Losing your keys is not finding them, then looking through your house and then going "Oh there they are! I put them in the freezer when I took out a fudgesicle! Hee-hee!" No. These things dropped off the face of the earth. I tore apart my register tonight in a panic looking for them...no. I went over every single possible feasible location for them and my cell phone. No.
So here's what I wanna know. What the fuck happens to these things? Is there some asswipe out there with mono taking my cell phone, my keys and spitting in my food? Because I don't know how all these things can happen. I didn't set these things down and forget...they completely disappeared. I spent 30 mins digging through the snow outside my car thinking that that's the only possible place that it could be...but no. It wasn't. How do things like that that defy logic happen?
Argh. I'm going to bed. I'm tired. I have mono. I want to shoot myself...but then I look at my picture and I remember how much I rule. Oh yes. I rule.